A period in time that really defines who I am!
In 1998,
when I was 11 years old, I remember my mother coming into my room asking me if
she could talk to me about something very important. At first, I thought I might be in trouble but
then I noticed a sincere gaze upon my mother’s face. My mom sat on the edge of
my bed started telling me a story about this great lady she met online named
Kathy. My mom then went on to explain that Kathy was going to move from Pennsylvania
to come live with us in Florida and that she would be her new girlfriend. At
that moment, I knew my life would change forever; I was going to have two
mommies! All I can remember was telling my mother was to do whatever makes her
happy. To this day it is still shocking to me that I said that. In few months
time, Kathy moved in. I don’t remember very much about that day she arrived,
but I assume that my sisters and I greeted her with open arms; my twin sisters
were 4 at the time. As time passed,
Kathy became just another member of my family, but to all outsiders, she was
known as my aunt. In 1998, being gay was not as acceptable as it is today.
Besides
the fact that my mother is gay, the true defining moment in my life was Kathy
moving in; Kathy above all things helped build me into the person I am today.
Kathy was a stickler for the rules and taught me many mannerisms: she taught me
not to use my hands while eating; if she caught me, she would stab me in the
hand with her fork. She taught me to only use one towel a week; if I used any other
towel besides my own, I would lose my privilege to use a towel that week period.
She taught me to always do my chores when told; if I didn’t wash the dishes after
dinner like I was told, the dishes would end up on my bed. She taught me to
always put thing back where they go; if I didn’t, they would disappear. I remember
Kathy always telling me to put my bike away and/or to stop leaving it in the
middle of the walkway. Eventually Kathy got fed up and hid my bicycle from me and
told me that it was stolen; she eventually gave it back, but I would have to
say I learned my lesson.
That
same summer, when I was 14 Kathy found me sitting on a young boys lap on a park
bench; at that moment Kathy decided to send me to live with her friend Hero for
the summer. Hero lived in Clifton, NJ and owned her own cleaning business. Kathy
believed that Hero would be able to teach me a few things and keep me out of
trouble. Kathy was right! When I arrived, Hero offered me a job as a
professional house cleaner and told me that I would be making $8.25 an hour; as
a 14 year old that was a lot of money. Over time, without me knowing it, Hero
taught me workmanship among other things. If it was for Kathy, I wouldn’t have had
all the amazing experiences that I did that summer with Hero. I not only did I
have the opportunity to work and make a lot of money, but I had the opportunity
to spend almost every weekend in New York City. New York City was an adventure!
I ate fancy restaurants, I watched Riverdance on Broadway, I visited the Statue
of Liberty and Ellis Island, and I watched fireworks on the 4th of
July in Manhattan. What more could a 14
year old girl ask for.
Although
Kathy at that time was my worst enemy, today she is a charitable asset. I could
not even imagine what my life would have been like without her in it. Even
though Kathy and my mom are no longer together, Kathy and I remain close
friends. She will always be a member of my family.
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